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My Last Thesis Journal

Le Mage Journal

2002-01-02 - 10:48 a.m.

:):):):):):):):):):):):):)

so bryan is all moved into his new place and the cats are allowed into his rom so I am extraordinarily happy. Not just because I had bryan for days on end and now I get to play Diablo ( which is actually a bryan link in my mind- like playing diablo is doing something that shows I'm his.

Trying to stay away from too much mushiness but he's right about the closeness. I delibratly try not to think about or notice it though. Everything is so good I dont want to expect more or think its more and ruin it.

SO we spent new years at arthurs. I played diablo while he and: rich, mindy, adam, renee, steve, mindy, bruce, john. arthur and amy did magic night.

I will say it wasn't my ideal night. But neither of us would have had enough energy to do anything even at a real party so I think it was for the best.

Bryan's new roomate is michel the very gay music/merril lynch man. His cat is fiona. very pretty but not as nice as Poi or Ogre or even Banshee.

Do I find little things to worry or stress about since I dont have any big things? Relationship wise I mean.

I have been re reading my bryan relationship diary entries. its weird to see how accuratly it reflects me overall. Happy but neurotic about little things.

The dude abudes. I have definetly changed in terms of catchphrases and the like since thne. But ten months before that I was different too.

Gah - almost 11 months.

It's. ok. I am going to continue to change while remaining in the same sitation as long as I am wanted.

I am warmed by him. Upheld, aided, abbetted, conspired with, and for what its worth, however little or much, temporary or enduring, loved. Which reflects my feelings. which i dont always say. I think it a lot though. Like when i somewhat randomly hug him or touch his ears or play with the cats or lie in his robe. Those all mean "I love you."

New years resolution type thingies?

1. Try not to worry so much.

2. Make sure Bryan feels appreciated. A lot.

3. Spend more time with Diane.

4. Calmly listen to what my mother says not what I think she means.

5. Find out more about SLG.

6. Not scream at George to shut up when he barks his fool head off for no reason.

7. Seven is being told ABP has no chicken ready for chicken ceasar salad at 8:30 am.

8. Use more pet names (excluding pumpkincakes).

9. Get a summer job.

10. Learn to cook SOMETHING>

-bsg-

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