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My Last Thesis Journal

Le Mage Journal

2003-02-19 - 6:07 p.m.

The final Joe Million-pains-in-my-ass update via moi and salon.com

"Melissa, a simpering whiny girl with pouty lips and curls so overmoussed that you can smell the alcohol escaping from your TV's speakers. She is there mostly for unintentional comic relief, like when she tells Evan, over a dinner she refused to help cook, "If I had the money, and the time, I'd wanna go to Africa, to bathe the children. And give them shots. I can't help it, I'm a mercenary person. "

We will give her the benefit of the doubt and assume she meant missionary."


What if Mojo was the true innocent?

It was clear from the start that Mojo's days were numbered. She was, well, she was tacky. She couldn't dress. She had a grammar problem. And worst of all, she didn't know how to hide her lust for money, her almost childlike belief that if she just stared at him hard enough, licked her lips frequently enough, pressed her breasts into his face often enough, he would give in to her charms.

And she couldn't hide anything, not from us, not from Evan. First she showed him her photo album, along with a check, dated two years into the future, payable to herself, for $1 million. "Just like Jim Carrey," she told Evan, who stared back at her poker-faced. "Did you know Jim Carrey did that?" she went on, with no encouragement. "I think he did it for 5 million, though."

She read him a love poem she'd written for him, before ever meeting him. Its last line came in the form of one of those photo puzzles you can get made for $7.99 at Walgreens. And the puzzle was a full-body shot of her! With the words "I choose you" scrawled like a prayer over her belly.


hahahaha

I really love reality television.

Didin't looooove donnie darko, but the music- uhnuh!

and thanks to mark the manipulated for telling me about this:
Which Donnie Darko character are you? by Shay Greaaaaaat. Look for flying bits of aircraft to kill me in a theater or bedroom near you!

-bsg-

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